I can’t even believe I have to even say this, but it appears I must: Prospective dates don’t want to know what you look like on a Sunday when you haven’t run a comb through your hair, or shaved, or put on a stitch of makeup. As a rule, women tend to fudge their weight while men fudge their height. Not one day when you decided to make yourself look weirder than usual. It’s not the worst idea in the world to get some nice shots done of you.Someone you date may eventually see you that way, but I wouldn’t say it’s what you lead with. Sure, you looked great in 1992, but since I don’t have a time machine, I can’t meet that person. And both lie about their age (something I do NOT recommend). So don’t go on a whole rant in your profile defending your age, etc. Dudes are especially prey to this kind of digital dismemberment. Either way, the person viewing it is wondering what you “really” look like. I have a friend who decided to do this, and has some really great pictures, that yes, she uses on her dating profile, but she also has.
Reason being, the “here I am holding up my i Phone in the mirror”—especially when we can see the phone—is, well, extraordinarily lame, no matter how you slice it. Do what you can with lighting etc to create a more flattering shot (tip: shooting up at yourself with your camera isn’t going to be your best angle). The picture should be you now, not you ten years or ten pounds ago. When else would you ever have cause to only ask a disembodied face out on a date? So having some shots of you where we can at least see what the head is attached to is a good idea. I’m not going to be holding a conversation with your abs. I’d love to see some full-body shots, sure, but preferably clothed and in a normal context (you on a beach or whatever), not you doing your best impression of a centerfold. I thought, what on earth gave this woman the idea that this would help her situation? There are plenty of places online to view naked people. Dudes, no one wants to see random naked body parts. Like any dog owner knows, it’s a nice way to break the ice. Or worse: a picture of you with your arms wrapped around some blonde whose FACE YOU HAVE DIGITALLY SMUDGED OUT. And rather than less authentic, I find professional shots MORE authentic—because a professional can capture you at your best, at your most natural.
Every photo that is uploaded onto the website is pushed through a filter that detects face and nudity.
It then scores the picture and will reject if it detects a certain level of nudity.
Ok Cupid did not respond to requests for additional information on how it works with its moderators. There are strict guidelines for profile pictures -- no nudity, it must be of you (no "pets, cars, artwork, etc."), no extreme closeups -- and a predictable set of rules governing good behavior -- no spamming, no hate speech, no harassment, no "commercial solicitations," no “crude, overt sexual remarks" and no threatening messages.
Cantwell walked us through life as an Ok Cupid moderator and what happens on the side of the Internet most never see. Users can flag a profile and then the profile gets put into what’s basically a queue for the moderators to go through. People report things like, “There’s a picture of their car” and I’m like, “I don’t care if they post a picture of their car, I don’t care what the rules are.” Out of a few dozen, I’d say I’ve only flagged two or three for deletion.